Its been a while since I last wrote. In amongst all the usual things that keep me from blogging, such as my job and having Boot Camp in the evenings, I have been suffering from headaches that have come and gone for days on end, the latest having stuck with me for pretty much four days in a row, being from Wednesday until Saturday when it seemed to reach its climax.
Basically I would wake up with a slight pounding in my head, which would develop throughout the day, regardless of any amount or brand of painkillers that I gulped down. Boot Camp seemed to quell it for up to half an hour or so afterwards, but then it would return with a vengeance so that watching TV or even just being awake would be quite unbearable.
Saturday, however started off with me feeling okay. As usual I could feel the ever so slight promise of a headache when I woke up, but had no tablets at home to try to stop it in its tracks. (I've found that the earlier you can catch a headache, the better). I went off to the drop-in Boot Camp, which is an optional extra where friends and family (although only women) may attend to see what Boot Camp is all about. I find that during exercise my headaches tend to take a backseat. Either they disappear for the period of time that I'm exercising, or I just don't seem to notice them as much. According to this article, "during physical activity, your body releases certain chemicals that block pain signals to your brain". I've found that while true, it's relatively temporary in my case.
Anyway, after Boot Camp I took an hour long walk to Boyfriends office as he was expecting clients and therefore wasn't able to pick me up. Of course I didn't mind having to walk one little bit. Any chance to get a bit of exercising in and I'm happy. I had plenty of water, so I hardly think that the headache worsened due to dehydration, but by the time I had arrived I could feel that the pounding in my head had increased. Unfortunately Boyfriend still wasn't able to take me home by that time as more clients were coming in. I elected to wait in the park down the road where I could relax and cool down, as well as reminisce on the carefree days of my past here a lot of my time was spent at that particular park, being around the corner from the last house I lived in with my family before they moved to Bloemfontein.
I had about an hour and a half to spend in my own company, and quite enjoyed it actually. For as long as I can remember I have always been someone who is capable of being quite content in my own company, thinking my own thoughts and doing my own things. In my very much younger days I was always the quiet little girl in a world of her own, dreaming up stories and climbing up my favourite avocado pear tree and singing to myself. (It's true!). Putting on a cream wrap-around skirt of my mother's that flowered out when I twirled around in circles. Swinging around a lamp post in my back garden while singing songs from the musical, "Phantom of the Opera" to myself while my mother listened secretively from the washing line around the corner. Those are sweet, sweet memories. But I am digressing now, and getting caught up in the happy memories of my childhood. Its a change from the unhappy things I usually tend to remember.
During my wait in the park, my headache grew steadily stronger and stronger. Instead of enjoying myself in the peaceful surroundings I found myself closing my eyes and holding my head in my hands, willing the hands on my watch to move faster. Two young boys of about 17 or 18 years old sat smoking and playing music from a cell phone, throwing curious glances my way every once in a while. Eventually I heard the sound of footsteps crushing the sun scorched grass in front of me. I looked up to see that one of the boys was approaching me slowly and uncertainly. When he saw me look up he stopped and glanced towards his friend who remained seated in one of the swings. A look passed between them.
"Come on!" the boy who approached me seemed to be pleading with his eyes. To confirm this, his hand made a slight beckoning gesture, but his friend remained where he was.
When a substantial awkward moment had passed without his friend joining him he turned to me again.
"Um, are you okay?" he asked slowly, his face crinkled with concern.
"I'm okay, thank you. Why?" I asked a little confused.
"Well, its just that you look sad, and you've been here alone for a long time. Is something wrong?"
I smiled and replied that I wasn't sad, but that I just had a really bad headache and that I was just waiting for my boyfriend to finish work so I could go home. I saw him eyeing my clothes and quickly explained that I had just come from an exercise class and had walked to the park from there.
"Oh, so that explains the.....uh" he made a vague gesture towards my sporty clothes and running shoes.
"The clothes, that's right". I finished off.
"So....you're okay then?" he asked again.
"I'm okay, but thank you for asking".
I was pretty touched by the gesture, especially of a boy of his age and in the company of a friend. Somehow its not what I would have expected of a teenager these days.
He bid me goodbye and shortly afterwards the two of them left the park. I could almost imagine the scenarios that must have run through that poor boy's head because of what I must have looked like sitting all by myself for an hour and a half, constantly checking the time and sniffing at intervals. (My nose was bothering me at the time).
Scenario 1 could possibly have been that I had either had a fight with a boyfriend, or that I had been stood up.
Scenario 2 could possibly have been that I was feeling incredibly depressed and suicidal, as I was examining my wrists and inner arms quite a lot. For some reason I had little red itchy spots on my left wrist, which I assume must have been from doing (or attempting to do) push-ups on the grass at Boot Camp. I had also been writing words on my arms with a sharpened stick to pass the time. I'm sure it could have looked quite bad. Had I in fact been suicidal his kindness might have saved my life.
Anyway, all that aside, my headache continued to get worse. When eventually the time came when Boyfriend finished work and could go home, I was in agony. We had quite a lot of grocery shopping to do that day, so I elected to go home and have a rest while he did the shopping, the most important item on the list being "PAINKILLERS!!!".
After my nap I felt quite refreshed until I actually stood up and the blood seemed to rush in all kinds of directions in my head, bringing back the awful pounding. I gratefully gulped down some tablets and waited for the edge of the pain to be taken off, but nothing happened. Hours later I took some more. Eventually I felt it begin to loosen its hold on me, and the muscles in my jaw seemed to relax somewhat, although the pain never disappeared completely.
It seemed that my entire Saturday, save for Boot Camp and my walk to Boyfriend's office, was a complete waste of a day because really I couldn't do anything but complain and hold my head or rub my eyes to try to relieve the pain. I'm prone to headaches anyway, and my mom is the same, so I'm used to getting them, but I can't remember a time when one particular headache lasted this long. Today is relatively okay, although I did take some tablets this morning. While it isn't interfering with my work too much today, I still feel a little heavy-headed and drained from it all.
***In other news: My tooth is now sorted! I can now smile again without feeling nervous when someone is standing to my right. I do, however catch myself trying to curb a big smile into a closed mouth one before remembering that its once again okay to give a toothy grin.
My boss has paid R2 500.00 over to my dentist, which will be deducted from my salary in the amount of R500.00 each month. Unfortunately interest of 8% is going to be charged because apparently he doesn't want to do any favours and I don't want any favours either. (say what? - Isn't that why I'm asking?). Anyway, its a hell of a lot better than putting the whole amount onto credit card, so I'm not complaining at all. Of course I will be making a concerted effort to pay this amount back sooner than the five months or so that it will take with the R500.00 coming off my salary.
My dentist surprised me by knocking off a further R500.00 from his fee, which I was very touched by. His reason was that I've been a patient of his for many, many years now, and he'd like to help me as much as he can. Of course when he looks into my mouth he probably sees plenty of work to keep the money rolling in, but anyway. The scary thing is that he's right. I've noticed that there are about two teeth that are looking as if they are going the very same way as the one I've just had work on. I suppose I don't need to express how terrifying that prospect is for me. I will definitely need to look into a medical aid plan of some sort.
My Sunday was full of swimming, drinking Brutal Fruits (because my headache had finally disappeared), good food, and little children running around at a braai with the Boyfriend's extended family. At least all that made up for Saturday. Except that I am now thoroughly exhausted. So much so that I would gladly trade this evenings Boot Camp for my nice cosy bed.
That's gotta tell you something!
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